Tuesday, August 18, 2009
The magical dress
I have butterflies in my stomach today. Not quite sure if they are the good, excited butterflies or the nervous, 'oh my god I dont want to do this' butterflies.
See, today my bridesmaids and I are going to look at wedding dresses for the first time. And even though I want to be jumping up and down with joy about this, I cant help but think it might be a disaster. There is a part of me that is just dreading it.
Normally I love shopping. I cant get enough of it. I go every other week or so to my favorite shops. And I LOVE dresses. I have a closet full of them. But wedding dresses....scare me.
I dont mind that its a lot of money to spend on something Ill only wear once. I want to feel amazing on my wedding day and I want that special dress. But spending the time and effort to find it does not sound like fun.
But maybe it will be. I dont know. Ive never done it. Ive never been a bridesmaid before either. I did go with two different girl friends to help them pick out their dresses and their experiences werent horrible. Maybe mine wont be either.
I guess the reason Im dreading it most is that Im worried Im going to look in the mirror and hate what I see. What if Im not pretty enough for the dress? What if I look fat? What if I hate the way my ass looks? What if I cant find a style that is flattering for me?
Most girls seem to have an idea before they go to a boutique of the style they like. Or they even have that one dress in mind that they found online or in a magazine. I have neither. Ive gone through countless magazines and webpages and havent found a dress I can call THE DRESS. I went through over 3,000 dresses on The Knot and didnt find a single one that moved me. Ive been able to find bits and pieces of dresses I like, but not a single dress that Im dying to try on. And Im not talking about dresses within a certain price range, Im talking about ALL the wedding dresses Ive looked at.
So far, this has been the least exciting part of wedding planning for me. I would rather stay at home and work on DIY projects with my darling Ned. I have a year to go though. Hopefully during this time Ill be able to find a dress I not only love, but that I feel beautiful in. Something that makes Ned's jaw drop.
Im just gonna cross my fingers that tonight isnt too hard on me. The shop we are starting with is a bridal consignment shop so they have all sorts of different style dresses from different designers. Its kinda exciting when you dont know what you will find. But also a bit terrifying when you dont know if there will even be something in your size to try on. And let me just also add while Im talking about size, that I hate that wedding dresses are sized so differently than normal clothes! If I wear a certain size at The Gap or H&M (normal places I shop), then I want to be that same size in a wedding dress, not 6 sizes bigger! I thought the point was to make brides feel beautiful so they spend thousands of dollars on a dress, not to make them feel fat.
Brides of France